A voice was heard in Ramah.

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This cat is HDB approved.

Jocelyn A. Monique

is currently an undergraduate student, and coping with her ~~overwhelming~~ commitments. I like long walks in solitude, cosy chats, usually sleep like a log, and beg your patience in tolerating my versatile humour

post ndp

Thursday, August 12, 2010

11:00 PM

Heyho, so the big hooha over National Day is over and so are the holidays aren't we glad. Don't get me wrong, I really love Singapore and this year's song rocks (Corrinne May bias) but I recongnize propaganda when I see it.
First week of school and already headlong into dramatic encounters 101, that really leaves me regretting the enormous Internet time I spend idling and messing things up when I could be saving my sorry CAP.
Alot of things have been happening that's made me damn upset and hurt going both ways. And it really hurts when it comes from someone you know, even when you meant it with the best of intentions.
The problem is that everybody tends to view me as a sweet and docile creature when my ugly doppelganger is just waiting to be unleashed unto some poor unfortunate soul. The truth is, I actually can be mean and incisive when I'm not being politically correct and I really wish people would appreciate my genuine honesty instead of being excessively judgmental. Often hypocritically so.
I have an attitude problem just like everyone else so wake up people.
If I don't talk to you, deal with it. If I'm moody, I'm having my moment.
If I'm busy, I'm really busy and you don't need imba analytical inferring skills to understand what that means.
Feeling a little irritated because too many moments this week when intentions and outcomes vary, which has left me reflecting whether it was right of me to garner my first impression in the first place.
Oh my tian I am becoming very... naggy and teacher-like I swear my tutoring side has taken over.

Anyway. First week of school, and had draining lectures, boring lectures, interesting lectures. Plenty of drama getting my novels and my constant whining has even led to sponsorship by.. MOM <3 Yes. I pay for my own damn novels and I feel the damn pinch, and sometimes I really wish I could splurge my parents' money on first hand books without a second thought but that's me being all stoic and self-righteous.
It's familiar and warm to meet the usual suspects along the walkway, I saw many people today while I was shuttling between Science and Arts, made 3 transactions and bought 3 books and borrowed 2. I kind of miss Romeo/Reggae and seeing them attending PL/EC lectures make me a little left out, for I am a lonely EN major and my major comes with a great heap of self-tragedy.

I am also learning to make new friends, something very difficult for I am by nature a creature of habit. People like to assume I am hypersocial but acquaintences and friends vary, it's same same but different de.
At the same time, I fear the old friendships may be tested by the out of sight out of
mind theory.

Major change lies ahead, if only I would just grow a backbone and assert myself for once and with Sash's words of advice but a faint echo,
I push on.

Amen.

the usual suspects

Aiming
Beans
Carmen
Cereal Tossers
Deborah Faith
Hao Wen
Jacq
Joel
Marie
Ngee Derk
T Lo